Opened 15 years ago

Closed 14 years ago

#40 closed editorial (fixed)

Editorial nits

Reported by: pasi.eronen@… Owned by:
Priority: minor Milestone:
Component: draft-ietf-tls-rfc4346-bis Version: 03
Severity: Keywords:
Cc:

Description

Remaining RFC editor changes from RFC 4346:

1 "various higher level" -> "various higher-level"
1 "protocols which run on" -> "protocols that run on"
4 "it has no have" -> "it has no"
4.3 "a new type T' that is" -> "a new type, T', that"
4.6.1 "For example, a" (orange VariantRecord) -> "For example, an"
4.7 "length of this structure, in bytes would be" 
  -> "length of this structure, in bytes, would be"
6 ", and reassembled, and" -> ", reassembled, and"
6.1 "encryption algorithm, and MAC algorithm" 
  -> "an encryption algorithm, and a MAC algorithm"
6.1 "size of the hash that is returned by" 
  -> "size of the hash returned by" 
6.2.3.2 "frustrate attacks on a protocol based on" 
  -> "frustrate attacks on a protocol that are based on"
7 "for formal definition,)" -> "for formal definition.)"
7.2.2 "all messages which are transmitted" 
  -> "all messages that are transmitted"
7.3 "man in the middle" -> "man-in-the-middle"
7.3 "attacks available: for" -> "attacks available.  For"
7.4.2 "All certificate profiles, and" 
  ->  "All certificate profiles and"
7.4.8 "(i.e. all certificates" -> "(i.e., all certificates"
7.4.9 "alerts and, any" -> "alerts, and any"
10 "fragmented, compressed and encrypted" 
  -> "fragmented, compressed, and encrypted"
D.1 "128-bit PRNG, one would" -> "128-bit PRNG would"
E.2 "right-hand (least-significant)" 
  -> "right-hand (least significant)"
F4 "chosen plaintext attacks and the MAC" 
   -> "chosen plaintext attacks and that the MAC"
F4 "but is not guaranteed" -> "but it is not guaranteed"
F4 "and unpredictable, IV" -> "and unpredictable IV"
F4 "This verson" -> "This version"
F4 "proven secure see" -> "proven secure, see"

Other nits

Table of contents is not in sync with section headings (e.g. sections 10..12 are missing, perhaps something else as well).

7 "such as the hash_size" -> "such as the mac_length"

7.3, Fig. 1 should probably omit CertificateStatus and CertificateURL since they're not defined in this doc any more

7.4.1.3 "the version is 3.2" -> "the version is 3.3"

7.4.1.4.1 "HashType types<255>" -> "HashType types<1..255>"

12.1 whole section can be removed (it's redundant).

A.3 "decryption_failed(21)" -> "decryption_failed_RESERVED(21)"

A.3 "no_certificate_RESERVED (41)" -> "no_certificate_RESERVED(41)"

A.4.1 definition of ClientHello/ServerHello is not exactly the same as in Section 7.4.1.2/7.4.1.3

A.4.2, remove CertificateStatus and !OCSPResponse

A.6 "enum { stream, block } CipherType;" -> "enum { stream, block, aead } CipherType;"

references: [HTTP], [IDNA], [OCSP],[PKIOP], [URI], [UTF8] are not cited anywhere and can be removed.

references: [TLSAES], [TLSEXT], and [TLSKRB] are informative instead of normative.

references (and elsewhere): "[PKCS1B]" -> "[PKCS1]" ?

Change History (1)

comment:1 Changed 14 years ago by ekr@…

  • Resolution set to fixed
  • Status changed from new to closed
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